Exploring luxury safaris in Africa

A lighthearted experience from a luxury Safari in Tanzania

A premium safari vacation in Tanzania might be the nearest you'll get to starring in your own nature documentary if you've ever dreamt about a safari, sipping something fizzy as lions calmly stroll past. And when I say "luxury," I'm not referring to a tent with a bit of a bad bed. I mean real, five-star, make-you-wonder-why-you-ever-bothered-with-normal life luxury, where your major worry is whether you would like breakfast on the patio or in the midst of the savannah.

From the moment you touch down in Tanzania, you soon understand this isn't your typical vacation. No hurrying to a jam-packed airport shuttle or tussling with a map here. A gracious driver welcomes you instead, then whisks you across scenery that makes your Instagram feed seem pitifully inadequate, and all of a sudden, you find yourself at your lodge, which could easily pass as a small hotel masquerading as a safari camp. Polished wood, fresh linens, and infinity pools looking out over the plains so huge you begin to question whether humans are meant to feel so tiny.

Next comes the safari, which can be at once exhilarating and humiliating. Your guide teaches you the subtleties of nature you would never see on your own, who is suspiciously cool about seeing elephants ten feet from the jeep. Personally, I spent the first morning trying to distinguish between zebras and really confused-looking horses. You will be wondering about your own ability to survive even as you admire nature. Do you... if a lion looks at you that way? Do you engage in casual chat?

Meals are an event all by themselves. Discard plastic cutlery and tepid buffet lines. We are discussing freshly made meals, usually made with local ingredients you cannot pronounce, accompanied by wines that make you feel a bit bad about drinking in the midst of a national park. It's a bizarre contrast: As you savour truffle risotto, you could also wonder, "Is that a cheetah over there?" When you understand you've been photographing every tree as though it's a rare species because the lighting is "perfect," you will likely giggle at yourself.

Evenings let you relax in the most decadent manner. Hot showers, comfortable beds, and the kind of soft lighting that makes you feel like the entire world is out to pamper you. Sipping a gin and tonic on your own deck while the sun sets behind a herd of giraffes is quite satisfying, but you find yourself wondering how very different this is from your normal Tuesday night, which most likely included cold pizza and scrolling through social media.

A luxury safari in Tanzania will indeed cause you to consider. You consider nature, man, and why you never really valued calm times spent at home. You could also consider your own level of adventure, or lack thereof, particularly in light of a bumpy ride across the Serengeti and hope that your safari hat remains fastened.

You go with your camera full of images, your head full of stories, and your heart, at last, surprisingly full of appreciation. It is outrageous, decadent, and exactly the right degree of humiliating. If nothing else, it reminds us how vast the world is, how brief life is, and occasionally, you deserve to do precisely nothing but observe a lion yawn.