Alright, buckle up because I’m about to spill the tea on a safari experience that’s less ‘roughing it’ and more ‘rolling in it’. Ten glorious days of bush and beach, where your biggest decision is whether to sip champagne from a crystal flute or a hand carved horn. Yes, this is the exclusive luxury safari, and frankly, I’m still a little bit in awe. Let’s start with the bush. Imagine this: you wake up not to an alarm, but to the gentle chirping of exotic birds and the distant, rather exciting, rumble of a lion’s yawn. Your ‘tent’ is more like a ridiculously plush suite, complete with a four poster bed, a freestanding claw foot bath, and a personal butler who seems to materialise out of thin air with your morning coffee. No, really. I tried to catch mine in the act, but he’s a ninja. A very polite, coffee wielding ninja. Days are a glorious mix of thrilling wildlife encounters and utter relaxation. Think open top jeep safaris, where you’re so close to the action you can practically smell the wildebeest. Our guide, a chap named Themba with eyes like a hawk and a encyclopaedic knowledge of everything with fur or feathers, was a national treasure. He’d spot a leopard lounging in a tree from a mile off, while I’d be staring at a particularly interesting looking shrub. My bushcraft skills are, shall we say, limited. But my ability to appreciate a perfectly chilled GandT while watching elephants bathe? World class. Evenings are a highlight. We’re talking sundowners around a crackling fire, under a blanket of stars so bright they look like they’ve been sprinkled by a celestial fairy. The food… oh the food. Think gourmet meals prepared with the freshest local ingredients, often served under the stars. I’m pretty sure I’ve gained a solid two pounds just from the canapés. Worth every single delicious, buttery bite, I tell you. Then, just when you think life can’t get any better, we swap the dust for the dazzling blue. Ten days of bush and beach means we transition seamlessly to the coast. Picture this: pristine white sands, the gentle lapping of turquoise waves, and your accommodation is a private villa with its own plunge pool. Forget fighting for a sun lounger; your personal staff will have your towel strategically placed before you’ve even finished your breakfast croissant. Activities here are equally indulgent. Think snorkelling in vibrant coral reefs, where you’ll encounter fish so colourful they look like they’ve escaped from a rave. Or perhaps a sunset dhow cruise, complete with more champagne and seafood so fresh it practically winks at you. We even had a private yoga session on the beach as the sun rose. Me, a yoga mat, and a very patient instructor. I think the instructor was more impressed by my ability to hold a downward dog for a full three seconds than my actual flexibility. Self reflection time. Before this trip, my idea of ‘luxury’ involved a fluffy hotel bathrobe and free Wi Fi. Now? It’s the feeling of absolute peace, the knowledge that every detail is taken care of, and the sheer wonder of experiencing nature at its most raw and beautiful, all while being treated like royalty. It’s a rather addictive feeling. If you’re looking for an adventure that’s both exhilarating and utterly pampering, this ten day bush and beach escapade is, without a shadow of a doubt, the one. Just be prepared to have your expectations thoroughly, and wonderfully, exceeded. And maybe pack an extra stretchy waistband. You’ll thank me later.